It Feels Like My Prayers Are Hitting The Ceiling
Sometimes it feels like my prayers are hitting the ceiling.
It feels like I don't want to start praying because, if I DO start, it feels like my prayers won't make any difference anyway. Something tries to convince me that it doesn't matter whether I pray or not.
Sometimes it's hard to pray because I don't know WHAT to pray.
At other times it's hard to pray because I feel guilty for not having prayed ENOUGH throughout the last week.
Recently, there are TWO THINGS THAT I'VE BEEN DOING when these types of thoughts run through my head.
1- I Lay On The Ground.
When I'm alone (and the kids are in bed) I put on 2 praise songs and lay down with my back on the floor. My goal, during that time, is to do nothing. I try not to think about what's happened that day or about my long "TO-DO" list. I tell myself not to feel any pressure to start praying or singing right away. I just lay.
Usually, after the songs are done, I feel a lot better. I feel less stress and less pressure. I feel calmer and more peaceful. It becomes easier to have motivation to start praying.
2- I go to www.SacredSpace.ie
My dad recommended this prayer website to me. It's been really helpful to me. It has a series of prayers to get me started when I don't know how or why to start praying. There are new prayers to pray on different days. Sometimes the prayers repeat. There's also a short passage of scripture to read and then a suggestion talk with Jesus about it. I also like that they have a little music icon that you can click, which plays peaceful harp music in the background.
I highly recommend it. It's helped my relationship with Jesus.
Reflection:
Over the last few days how easy/hard has it been to pray?
Take a moment to ask yourself, "why has it been easy or hard to pray?"
God's Word:
"You, God, are my God. Earnestly I seek you, I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water." Psalm 63:1
Songs:
Consider listening to these songs that go along with the theme of dryness and emptiness in prayer.
Pray:
"God. It's not easy for me right now. There seem to be a million reasons why I shouldn't pray. I need your help. Help me to be brave. Help me to know that you love me in my weakest times. You love my weak prayers. You like it that i'm trying. Help me to pray even when it's not clear why I should. Help me to pray even when I feel like it's meaningless. I need you more than air. I need you more than food."